So mainly the basis of my whole rant / story is to to thank God on how amazing my last year was. It was equally as testing as it was trying.
I have to call out myself every single time because it is much needed.
I have been super ungrateful and giving the enemy an “in” in my life by complaining.
Although towards the end of last year I cut it out, I still didn’t do enough.
I used to be as private as the word private gets for very necessary reasons.
But God let me know my calling requires some sort of reveal and availability and although it’s kinda uncomfortable, I’m okay with it.
2014 was one of the most challenging but also one of the most elevating years of my life at the same time.
The thing is the challenges were so much that whenever a blessing came, I did not acknowledge it.
You see, it was not enough “compensation” for my struggle as so I felt and so I pretty much just let it pass over my shoulder like “eh cool”.
The thing is sometimes our sight gets so blurry because of our illusion of what is meant to be.
But the truth is as much as the devil might attack me, God increases me even more. It’s exactly like Exodus 1:12.
In 2014, I was depressed, tired and burnt out. I was tired of being attacked here and there. I was tired of being the strong one.
But I was growing, I was still growing non-stop and getting better in every single area of my life.
My dad almost lost his life. As a matter of fact he basically lost his life. And I saw the strongest woman I have ever known break down.
My mum was weak. But I was mad. “My brother died but my dad won’t die, no.”
Just ’cause “he is still going to walk me down the aisle and see my success. He has to see this greatness they have always talked about.”
…It is a good thing for God to speak through you.
My mum called me at about 4am to quickly start praying. My dad was going and she didn’t know what to do…talk about tongues laced with “holy anger”.
I had never heard her almost give up, be so fed up and utterly defeated but still strong at the same time.
But if you know me, you know the devil knows not to look for my trouble because I’m Jesus’ baby and when he crosses that line . . .
I was in the shower and God spoke to me saying “There shall be showers of blessing” and I was like what? Like how is that even possible?
And then I tried to sing the whole song and through the words realized it said “this is a promise of God..There shall be seasons refreshing”…
So I called my mum and said God said . . . so he’s not going to die.
From La to Houston, straight after my exams to the ICU just praying and praying with my mum. We hardly ever slept for days.
But you see after that prophesy, I knew and was confident that when two or three gather in God’s name things happen.
That the prayer of the righteous availeth much. God makes dry bones rise again and whatever I decree shall be established.
Medical practitioners know your blood level should never be below 8..at most 5 but my dads fell below 3. He couldn’t do anything himself.
He was like a baby. My heart cried because it had been too much and part of me had come to accept it was God’s will to take him ..
Long and short of my dads story, he got healed, discharged. Got an $80,000 bill where they asked him to pay only a total of about $1000.
I was tired, drained and needed help. But my dad was fine now. He and my mum came to back to la with me and even worked on my one of my sets.
Talking about sets, God made me shoot a mini music video project from a song I liked about Africa.
I managed to get the same African dancers from the Michelle’s Say Yes video which was quite exciting.
It was my hardest school semester with my parents being here etc and we were praying for C’s even but I got A’s still and became Honors.
I got to work as the producer on a warner brothers artist’s video.
I blew the minds of some people and they said “everyone is asking about you”.
I got a really nice birthday gift due to God blessing my family.
I hosted a red carpet event of a show in which I was at first supposed to just “walk the door”
The same shows next episode, I missed the production meeting and then I found out I was going to be the main host.
Bare in mind I got chosen to only walk the door and I heard in my spirit “great things lie in small beginnings”
I’m not the prettiest, most talented or most outgoing. Heck I even have a mixed African, American and only God knows what accent.
But God’s got me. And most times things are not perfect or how they should be but I know God is working. He would not ignore his own.
That was 2014. And i grumbled my way through that. Never again! I don’t care if I see or I don’t see. I have faith. I trust God. I love God.
The greatest deliverance is realizing that God is smarter than you. Because truth be told some of us think we are smarter than God.
2014 was a year of lessons, progress, tiredness, emotional this, spiritual that, relationship this, almost giving up that but I’m here.
I’m here because God kept me, is always keeping me and will forever keep me no matter what anyone says or does.
Who do you serve? I serve Jesus and I can vouch for him. He works wonders.
I’m here because God kept me. He brought me out. He brings me out every time and I’m 100% sold out.
Honestly, someone; whoever read through my long rant needed to read or hear it because God hasn’t forgotten you. Rest while he works.
I really just wanted to thank God today because he that has started a good thing in all our lives will bring it to perfection.
And I’m saying all these just because it’s easy for us to think we are lagging behind, the enemy is winning, we are stagnant. But that’s a lie.
Please just renew your mind & try to stay happy whatever the case maybe. Trust God and his timing. Trust when I say he is forever faithful.
Trying to find self-worth in anything that has he ability to change is fatal because who you are is in God not in people or things.
About 3-5 months ago I decided to divorce worry. It’s been the best breakup ever. I’m having a time of my life just fully dependent on God.
It’s 2015 & I don’t know what exactly but this year holds divine acceleration, & the best attitude of alignment to receive it is GRATITUDE.
Praise Him. 🎀